Wednesday, January 04, 2012

Working Mama Wednesday - If I were a SAHM

After spending 2 weeks home with the kiddos I've been thinking about what life would really be like if I were a SAHM because as we all know a 2 week stint in the job doesn't really give a good preview of how things would actually be long-term.  I ended up with 2 lists - you'll see why.

List 1 - What I think I'd do as a SAHM...

  • Wake-up early most days (between 6:30-7am) & have a devotional time
  • Take a shower, get fully dressed with hair & make-up on 
  • Get up before the kiddos & make them a wholesome breakfast
  • Feed them leisurely around the breakfast table
  • Drive (or walk!) the older kiddo(s) to school
  • Spend the morning at the park or come home to a perfectly planned craft
  • Participate in MOPS, a playgroup or 2, 2-3 Bible studies or accountability groups
  • Hold a leadership position on PTA
  • Homeschool (It's my fantasy world...yes I can walk my kiddo to school in the morning and homeschool)
  • Cook some sort of nutritious yet kid-oriented lunch, like Grilled Cheese made with "real" cheese, homemade whole wheat bread and cut into dinosaur or flower shapes and broccoli grown in my garden
  • Garden
  • During naptime spotlessly clean the house, read 1 fun and 1 educational novel, & bake a snack to be ready for the kiddos afterschool/nap
  • Sew clothes for my kiddos
  • Always put the laundry away immediately after it's done being folded, which is immediately after it comes out of the dryer when the dryer stops
  • Play tea-party and dollhouse with my girls while playing "infection" with the boys (it's a dart-gun game they made up)
  • Crochet, paint, and scrapbook in my spare time
  • Watch all my favorite shows
  • Send "thinking of you" cards that I handmade to people I love often
  • Take on another foster child so my house would be full
  • Spend time doing something fun with my husband everyday
  • Take an afternoon walk to pick up the kid(s) at school (who are homeschooled)
  • Stop by the park (again) to play with the kiddos
  • Touch-up my makeup
  • Have lunch with friends often
  • Cook a nutritious dinner, preferably one that involves hours of slow roasting so it makes the house smell good
  • Visit the zoo, museums, and nature trails at least every 2-3 days
  • Have dinner on the table by 5:15pm, with all kids homework done.  (Of course the homework was done at the island, as a family, snacking on the homebaked goodies I made and the non-homework kids would have had another craft or learning activity exquisitely prepared for them).
  • Play outside with the kids before bathtime (which, of course, would happen every day in perfect peace)
  • Catch-up on finances (including couponing) with the hubby every night
  • Each of my kids would be in multiple activities like dance, baseball, karate, etc.
  • Take a shower every night - or a long bubble bath
  • Read stories to each of my kids every night before bedtime - which is consistently executed every night at the same time.
  • Exercise for 30-45 minutes a night
  • Change my sheets at least weekly - maybe every couple days
  • Go to bed with a clean kitchen, probably by 10pm every night at least.
How does that sound?  

List 2 - What I know I'd do as a SAHM
  • Set the alarm for 8am - only because I know that the kids would have woken up by 7 and I can't have them waiting for mie in their rooms for more than an hour - otherwise I'd sleep as late as possible.
  • Brush my teeth and maybe do more than put my hair in a ponytail.  Wash my face and maybe apply lotion.
  • Dress in whatever's clean and comfortable.  That would be a spruced up version of my PJs more often than not.
  • I probably would make breakfast more often than not - likely pancakes or eggs and toast.  Unfortunately because I got such a late start the kids will have been starving while I cooked the good stuff so they fill up on bananas, pop-tarts, and cereal while they wait.
  • I turn on the tv for the morning news - it doesn't get turned off until we leave the house, whenever that is.
  • I try desperately to get the kids to play upstairs while I catch-up on cleaning whatever is in the vicinity of the tv.  Get frustrated when they are too loud for mie to hear the tv or when they are begging mie to play upstairs or outside with them.  Decide to take them on a walk where I can put them in the stroller and then sit down on the curb while they play at the park.
  • Make PB&J for lunch with some sort of canned fruit.  I might use the cookie cutter to make it cute.  Or I'll go with boxed mac and cheese
  • Clean-up the kids (which means wipe their face and hands) and get them ready for nap-time.  
  • Rejoice in the quiet - maybe take a nap convincing myself I still need to sleep when they do, even though I didn't give birth to any of them recently.
  • Blame my husband when the housework doesn't get done - afterall I have 4 kiddos to watch!
  • Use the crockpot to get stuff cooked ahead of time.  If that doesn't happen because I forgot, then prepare spaghetti or pancakes for dinner.
  • Maybe I'd color with the kids or find a craft or play outside.  But only one of those things, and those might be usurped by a tv show or video game while I cleaned up whatever mess was at risk of becoming stinky or a physical hazard.
  • I probably would bake them a snack, but I'd get frustrated with them for creating all the chaos in the house while I was trying to make them a nice snack! (Gosh darnit)
  • I'd get the littles in bed on time then spend time with the eldest playing games or watching tv shows we enjoy together because I feel guilty that "his" time is spent so much on little kid activities.  He'd be in bed by 9:15 or 9:30 and by "in bed" I mean in my bed.
  • I'd either go to bed with the eldest and watch a movie or something in bed (and he'd stay up watching it with mie...) or he'd go to bed alone and I'd stay up watching some sort of trashy tv...I like intervention, hoarders, teen mom, or TMZ.  I'd let myself go to sleep around 11 or 12, hopefully after showering but not everyday.
Does that sound a little more realistic? 

Ugly but honest.  Maybe that's why I don't get to be a SAHM...


Mama P said...

Shoot, if those are reasons to not get to be a SAHM then I am fired. :)

Actually I have been a WAHM for the past four years. I JUST put my business on perpetual hold in November, swearing that I'd be caught up and acting like list number 1 within weeks. Then Dec.2 we got Peanut, and the rest is history. I may or may not have worn pajamas until 2:30pm today.

Monkey Momma said...

Hahahaha! Love this post. So perfect! Our fantasies never match up with reality.