Monday, January 11, 2010

Because There Are People out There Who Want to Be a Friend and Don't Know How

Here are a few links:

How To be A Good Friend To an Infertile

Infertility Etiquette

For Family and Friends

How Can I Help. The Dos and Don'ts of Support

The Empty Arms Video Link is good too.

Also, the Hannah's Hope book by Jennifer Saake is REALLY good.

2 comments:

Living with Three Boys of Our Own said...

These are great resources. Thanks! I'm always looking for things to pass along!

Monkey Momma said...

M, this is great. THANK YOU for placing this for us to read. I've been through this and forget myself what it means to minister to those in pain. I need the reminder!

When I went through my IF/PL journey, I was confounded on how to heal. Family attempts to comfort were well-meaning, but more often than not caused additional pain. They had never been in my shoes, they never understood the magnitude of the pain, and were quick to point the finger BACK at me, as if it were my fault. I guess the way I expressed or handled my grief wasn't the appropriate way for them. I was "supposed" to handle it differently. (I didn't know there were rules! Oops. Sorry!) Funny realization now though...most of those people that criticized and gossiped on how badly I handled things were making MY journey about THEM. It wasn't. It was mine and the Lords. I choose to believe the Lord will deal with them in His own time.

Also, I have had some tell me if they'd known WHAT to do, they'd have done it. Those that just said, "I have no idea what to say. How can I pray for you and minister to you?" were the ones that made the most impact. So now, I try to remember that when I find my friends going through ANY type of grief, infertility related or not. To not have expectations of them and just attempt to sit back and witness what God does in their lives, as I try to help them carry the burden. THAT choice in itself is a blessing!